DetectiveTective in: The SSB Murder Story
by DetectiveTective
Summary: The greatest video game designer is found dead on the floor. Who did it? Roy, of course. No? Was it somebody else? Yes. It must have been. There's more evidence than just Roy's sword in Miyamoto's shoulder. So someone else is behind this... Well, find out
1. A Phenom Crowned

**A/N: WAHOOO!! Second story!! Why am I doing this when I have a Sly Cooper story to finish? Well, wouldn't YOU like to know! This thing stars ME ME ME!!!!!! The girl Detective at work!! It's my DREAM to work as--**

**Roy- Can we PLEASE get on with the story already?**

**DT- QUIET, SUSPECT!**

**Roy- I told you, I DIDN'T DO IT!**

**DT- Sure, that's what they all say...**

**Roy- I'M SERIOUS!!**

**Kirby- And what if you're not?**

**Popo- Yeah, what HE said!**

**Fox- For all that we know, you COULD have killed him!**

**DT- Killed who?**

**Fox- YOU WROTE THE STORY!! YOU SHOULD KNOW WHO!!!!**

**DT- oh...him.**

**Fox-(Growls in frustration)**

**DT- No matter! On with this murder-mystery story!!**

**Marth- Well, it's about time!**

**DT- Hey! When'd YOU get here?**

* * *

**Detective Tective in:**

**The Murder of the Greatest Video Game Designer (It's a working title, People!)**

**1. Intro**

"I win again!" exclaimed the highly excited Roy.

He has just won his twenty-second tournament match in a row! No one can explain his sucessful winning streak, but he is just one more tournament away from becoming the first phenom in Super Smash history.

"Congratulations!" said the narrator man that congratulates all of the winners, "You have won twenty-two tournaments in a row! One more win, and you'll be the first to ever achieve phenom!"

"Thanks! I know I'm awesome!" he bragged.

"Okay, okay. You won your petty little match." said Marth, angrily, "You'll break your streak eventually..."

Yes, Roy's twenty-second match was against Marth. They both put up quite a fight, but Roy ended victorious.

"Jealous much?" asked Roy

Marth scoffed and said, "You wish."

As they exited the arena, the narator guy came back on.

"Surprise announcement, fellow fighters!" he said, "The video game genious, Shigeru Miyamoto, is coming to visit. He has a special announcement about the new Super Smash Bros. Brawl game coming out soon. It is very important that EVERYONE is present on the third floor."

The Super Smash Bros. tournaments are held in a large skyscraper building. It is here where they fight their hardest in order to reach the rank of Champion.

"You hear that, Marth?" said Roy, "Mr. Miyamoto is coming here to congratulate **ME **on my greatest victories and how I'll be one of the best characters in the next installment of SSB!"

"You keep that attitude up, and he might change his mind." replied Marth.

"Heh. We'll see."

"Yeah...we'll all see..."

"W'ever. Let's just go. The announcement will be held on the third floor, right?"

"Right."

"Then let's go!"

"Right behind ya!"

* * *

**A/N: Whoohoo! (I am just enthusiastic today!) Anyways, that's the first "intro chapter." It was only made to show you all the basics. I know this didn't have me in it just yet, but come on! Look at my other story in the meantime. That's just as good! **

**Roy- Tch! I bet it is!**

**DT- HEY!**

**Marth- Will you STOP being so irritable?**

**Roy- Shut up.**

**Peach- Why are you all fighting?**

**Zelda- Yeah! We're trying to read our romance novels over here!**

**Roy- Pipe down, Zelda!**

**DT- Is this chapter ever going to end?**

**Marth- Wait for it... wait for it... NOW!!**


	2. Cuts in the New Game

**DT: HIYA! It's me again. If you guys have read my story at all, you would find that Roy has won a whole heap of matches and will shortly be crowned "phenom."**

**Roy: Just like that basketball game!**

**DT: Which one? NBA Ballers? (Look it up on Google Images if you don't know what I mean)**

**Roy: Yeah! That one!**

**DT: Since WHEN do YOU play virtual basketball?**

**Roy: I...uh...just bought it...**

**DT: Do you know how old that game is?**

**Roy: It's not THAT old!**

**DT: True, true.**

**Mario: Can we just-a PLEASE get on with-a the story!**

**DT: Fine, Mario, we'll start.**

* * *

**2. Surprise!!! A Plan is Scheming...**

Roy and Marth rushed to the third floor of the SSB tournament building. To their surprise, everyone was already there. Mario, Ice Climbers, Mewtwo, Ganondorf, Link, Pikachu...EVERYONE! Roy and Marth split up to go talk to everyone and see how they were doing. Well, at least Marth dd. Roy went around bragging about how he kicked their asses in the last tournament, which just made everyone angry.

"Hiya, Peach!" said Roy with that smug grin, "I hope you weren't hurt too badly after our last encounter in the tournament."

"Don't push it, Roy!" she responded angrily, "Just because I was beaten in less than 15 seconds, it doesn't mean you have to go around bragging about it!"

"Oh alm down, Peachy!" he responded back, "I'm only messin' with ya! Usually I'd smack anyone whotalks back to me, but because you're pretty, I'll let you slide on that one."

"W'ever."

Suddenly, Mario and Captain Falcon made their way over to Peach and Roy.

"Hello, Mario." said Peach.

"Yo." said Mario.

Peach gasped.

"I never heard you talk like that before."

"Oh really?" he happily replied, "I'm-a learning some-a new lines from-a my main man CF over-a here! Is it-a pretty good-a slang, doll-a-face?"

"No."

"Aww... rats-a!"

"Pardon MY interruption," said Roy, "But you're Italian. Not black. Stop being something you're not."

"Shut up-a, asswipe!" Mario shouted back, "Italians have-a dreams too, ya know-a!!"

"And I guess it's not winning the tournaments! HAHAHA!!"

Mario, enraged and frustrated, ran off crying like a baby as Captain Falcon ran off after him. Suddenly, the narrator guy's voice came on.

"Attention all fighters!!" he shouted, "Mr. Miyamoto has arrived!"

With that said, all of the SSB characters joined together in one large group in front of the giant stand in the back of the third floor's auditorium. Roy stood next to Marth.

"Don't lose you rhead when Miyamoto shows up, okay?" said Marth, "You'd look like a fool... not to mention a complete **idiot**."

"Aw put a sock in it, Marth!" shouted Roy, "I'll do whatever I want!"

"Oh Lord..."

As they all gathered, they noticed Luigi come from behind the auditorium's curtains and come forward to the microphone.

"And-a now..." he began, "The man that-a started it all...my-a brother's creator...Mr...Shigeru...MIYAMOTO!!!!!

Then, there was a sudden upraoar of applause. Everyone LOVES Miyamoto. He's very kind and generous. He's The sole designer for Nintendo, and he has a nice gorgeous wife that ALL of the guy SSB characters know and love! As the applause continued, Mr. Miyamoto made his way onto the stage. The applause got louder and louder as Miyamoto got closer to the microphone. Luigi got out of the way and went to go stand with everyone else.

"Good evening." he began, "And how is everyone?"

"GOOD!!" they all shouted.

"Goo-reat! I'd like to also bring out Miss Detective Tective for helping me with my earlier crisis of losing the Super Samsh Bros. Brawl plans."

Then I, Miss Detective Tective, came out in my usual brown, heavy coat, with a big, giant, brown hat, cocked to the side, covering my left eye. I waved my hand to all of the SSB characters. A few didn't know who I was and the rest knew who I was.

"Now, as you all have heard," Miyamoto began again, "I am creating the SSB Brawl game, which is coming out soon. I have all of the plans with me now and I'm almost done sorting them out."

Everyone was really excited and had shown their enthusiasm more than a few mere times. Roy seemed to be the happiest out of them all. He actually had trouble containing his excitement!

"Am I gonna be in the next game, Miyamoto-san?!" he shouted, "'cuz I've been winning a lot of battles recently and I just wanna know!" **(A/N: Despite the fact that he thinks he knows the answer's gonna be yes)**

Marth put his hand on his head in frustration, knowing that Roy just did something stupid.

'The F (--BLEEP--) king **idiot!**' he thought.

"Uhhh..." started Miyamoto, "Technically...no. You're not in the game."

"WHAAAAAAAAAT!!!!" shouted the enraged Roy, "But... I've proven that I'm the best of the best! This can't be right. And what about Marth?"

"He's not either." responded Miyamoto again, "I took out a few characters to try and leave room for the new ones."

"WHAAAAAAAAAT!!!!" shouted the enraged Marth, "That doesn't make any sense!!!!!"

"I give you no bullsh(--bleep--) t." said Miyamoto.

"Aw crud." said Roy.

Well, isn't THIS a nice little picture? Roy and Marth aren't going to be in the next video game on the new console! HAHAHA! OH..uh...sorry. I kinda lost my head there.

With what Miyamoto had said, all of the SSB characters were looking at each other, very concerned on who was staying...and who was getting cut out...

Everyone scattered about trying to get their thoughts together. Marth and Roy tried negotiating with each other on what just happened.

"There's NO way I'm not going to be in the next game." said Roy, mighty angrily

"I know." said Marth, "We gotta think of something and fast!"

"Hmm... HEY! Remember what Miyamoto said about him having the plans with him right now?"

"Yeah!"

"You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"

"Hell no!"

"You're an idiot. Y'know that, right?"

"...shut up!"

"Make me! Anyways, what I was planning, was we steal Miyamoto's plans from his suit and then edit it by putting OUR names on the list."

"That's pretty sneaky, Roy. Are you sure that you're gonna be able to pull it off?"

"Come on! Did you NOT pay attention to the tournament match we just had? I blew you sky high with so many sensor bombs, it's not even funny! HAHAHA!!!"

"HEY! You jsut said that it wasn't funny!"

"Yeah. I lied."

"You asshole."

"Shut up. If you keep cursing like that, Detective Tective might have to change the rating on the story."

"Change what story's rating?" said a voice from behind.

"GEEYAH!!!!" shouted Roy, "Don't EVER do that again!!"

I had just walked behind them and caught the last few words that Roy had said. I was a bit confused on why he was so scared, but then I remembered that I had just sneaked up behind him on accident.

"S-sorry about that, Roy." I apologized, "But I just heard the last bit of your conversation and I was curious about why you were talking about me."

"We weren't trying to hurt your feelings or nothing like that." said Marth.

"O-or being racist!" added Roy.

Marth smacked him in the back of the head for saying something so stupid.

"It's okay." I said, "I know he wouldn't really say something racist about me. I know you can't find a lot of female black detectives out there, but I trust him."

With that said, I walked off to look around at all of the other SSB characters.

"Oh that was a close one." said Marth quietly.

Then he hit Roy in the back of the head again.

"BAKA!!" he shouted, "NEVER mess with a detective!"

"I wasn't messing with her!" Roy protested, "I was trying to save my ass from getting kicked!"

"Ugh... Never mind... just... just go get us a snowcone..."

"Oh alright! But we're still doing the plan!"

"Sorry. No thanks!!"

"WHAT? Oh, come ON!!"

"Sorry. You're on your own."

"Arggghhh... FINE!! I don't need you!"

"HAHA!! That sounded SO wrong just now!"

"...asshole..."

* * *

**DT: Well, I know I wrote the damn plot in the story, but sheesh, Marth and Roy have more issues than a Zangoose and a Seviper!**

**Roy: Shut up, you!**

**Marth: Roy, quiet. Or she'll do something you'll regret!**

**DT: That's right! I have authority in this story, so if either of you piss me off again, I'm gonna make you gay in the next chapter!**

**Roy: Oh GOODY GOODY!**

**DT: and Marth?????**

**Roy: Hold on... don't you mean, "gay," as in, "happy"...or do you mean...**

**DT and Marth: The other one**

**Roy: HOLY SH(-BLEEP-)T WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!!**

**The rest of the SSB cast- (Laughing their asses off)**


	3. Trouble at the Punch Bowl

**DT: Woah! I haven't worked on this in a LONG time! But one thing you ALL should know, is that a good detective NEVER drops a case!**

**Roy: And I take it you're not one of those good detectives**

**DT: Shut up Roy**

**Marth: Honestly, Roy, do you WANT to go to jail or not?!**

**Roy: Doesn't matter. I'm going to jail anyway...**

**DT: Oh what? You don't trust me?**

**Roy: Not so far as the eye can see...**

**Marth: ROY!!**

**Roy: What? All I said was--**

**Marth: I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID!! I just want you to SHUT UP!!**

**Roy: Tch! Whatever**

**Dt: (Feelings are hurt) now on with the story...**

* * *

**2. Trouble at the Punch Bowl**

Roy walked over to the juice stand and noticed Kirby struggling to reach the ladle in the punch bowl over the table. Roy snickered a little before going over, picking him up, and setting him atop the table. Unfortunately, that was the _worst _thing Roy could have done, because the minute Kirby's feet touched the table, he immediately started sucking up everything in his mouth. The puch bowl, the snack stand, the fruit salad-- EVERYTHING!! Roy laughed at this, as only the phenom can. Kirby looked at him innocently.

"What did I do?" he asked timidly.

"Nothing nothing." replied Roy, still chuckling, "Although, I suggest you leave the area immediately before--"

"EYO! Where's the food, man?!" shouted a voice from afar.

Roy turned around and noticed who it was.

Captain Falcon.

Roy couldn't help but smile heinously at him too.

"Oh, how are _you _today, Mr. 'C.F.'?" he chuckled.

Captain Falcon gave him an unfriendly look before saying, "It's a'ight. Watchoo want, foo'?"

"So _you're _the guy who's decided to degrade Mario into the already worthless bug that he is!"

"Eh, man, don't be talkin' 'bout my boy like that, or I'll--"

"Or you'll **_what?_** Land face-flat in the ground like you did in the tournament earlier? I think we _all _know who the better fighter is."

"Well it sure wasn't your _mother _in bed."

"**_WHAT THE F_** (BLEEP)**_ DID YOU SAY?!?!?!_**"

"It shouldn't concern you, Oh High and Mighty Phenom!"

Roy shook a sturdy fist at Captain Falcon as he walked away laughing to himself.

"Just you wait, Flava Flav wannabe," Roy murmured to himself, "You'll be the _first _to go once I get my hands on those plans!"

"What's wrong, Roy?" asked Kirby with great concern **(DT: Note-He's still on the table)**

"Oh nothing," replied Roy, "It's just that all of these people are so jealous of me being the Phenom. Remember when Mario was Phenom last year? _Everybody _loved him!"

"Well, wasn't it because of the fact that Mario was _nice _to everybody and wasn't _intentionally _trying to win?"

"That sucky rap artist was _planning to win _from the very beginning!!" Roy snapped back.

"Well, don't feel bad, Roy. You'll still be the most awesomest Phenom to me!" Kirby smiled

**(DT: Aww...)**

Roy suddenly gave Kirby a much nicer smile. It was all ruined when Marth made his way over to the (now) non-existent juice stand.

"Oh puh-lease, Kirby!" he groaned, "Everybody knows that _you _were the most _easily-defeated _character out of us all! And Roy, didn't I tell you to get me a snowcone?!"

"Uhh... well...uhh.. Kirby ate it!"

Kirby gave a sad look. "No I didn't! I just ate up all the punch!!"

"You can't lie your way out of _this _one, Kirby!" replied Roy, "Remember Peach's birthday party?"

"Hey! I was hungry!"

"IT WAS A SIX-FOOT HIGH CAKE, KIRBY!!"

"I didn't know anyone was gonna eat it!"

Suddenly, Kirby burst into tears, trembling and shaking. Then Marth stepped in.

"Uhh...Roy..." he said, "That's okay, I got myself a snowcone earlier today."

"THEN WHY DID YOU SEND **_ME _**TO GET ONE?!"

"I just like mesin' with you!"

Roy scoffed and left the area to go bother someone else. Kirby stood at the table, trying to steal Marth's snowcone from his hand. After several failed attempts, Kirby began crying again. From afar, Roy looked back at the two and saw Marth bend down and pat him on the head. He began to hand Kirby his snowcone, but then snatched it right back from him, making Kirby cry even more.  
Roy smirked at Marth.

"What a jerk," he said, still smiling, "I trained you well, hehehe..."

* * *

**DT: WOW, Roy, you were an ASSHOLE!**

**Roy: Survival fo the fittest, detective.**

**DT: Well, I'm not sure if I can help you now, seeing as how you're such a jerk!**

**Roy: OH NO, PLEASE DON'T GO! I NEED you to clear my name!!**

**DT: Only if you grovel at my feet**

**(Roy slowly goes over to DetectiveTective's shoes and kisses them, begging for her to stay)**

**(Marth comes over to DetectiveTective)**

**Marth: I trained you _well, _Detective. Hehehe...**


End file.
